A little of this, a little of that

Not much to say as far as my relationship goes.

It's officially been a week since my MIL went off on me, a 2 weeks since my BIL and I had that odd conversation.  I wish those thoughts would go away, and I caught myself this morning thinking about my wife and the good times we used to have.

Friday night I went to Celebrate Recovery services instead of my men's group.  I had a friend who was giving his testimony Friday night, and I was shocked at his life story....and even more impressed of the miracle that has happened since then to turn his life around.  It was just about three years ago that he and another stranger, both of them angry at the world and angry at themselves crossed paths at the wrong time.

My friend had been stabbed three times and he almost killed his assailant himself during a barroom brawl.  My friend spent time in jail, and the other man survived as well, each finding their own way and own path into Celebrate Recovery without the knowedge of the other.

Both eventually accepted Christ, and began their journey of forgiveness to all those they had hurt over the years, including themselves.

It would be almost two years later in which they would run into each other, of all things, a Thanksgiving Dinner.  Long story short....they shook hands, asked each other for forgiveness, and at the very least acquaintences and cordial with each other.

Wow.

I didn't know any of that, as we only became friends about 2 years ago ourselves. 

He is a transformed person.  Happy, loving, joking, friendly.  By his own admittance, a changed man.

While my own life story isn't nearly that tragic, I wish I had his peace in things.  I usually do when surrounded by friends.  The toughest challenge for me is the alone time.  For years it never bothered me to be alone.  I spent much of my youth alone, although I made friends easily, I just always was okay with our without people around me.  That might have changed in college where I met a great group of people, joined a fraternity, and made lifelong friends.

Today it's hard spending weekends by myself.  The house almost seems too quiet at times (albeit, I don't miss the smell of cigarettes or sarcasm).

I threw a BBQ this past Saturday.  I think 15 of my close friends showed up, and for those 5-6 hours, it felt like old times.  We joked, we ate, we traded barbs and stories...and I was at peace.  I have a great set of friends.  The subject of my wife only came up once or twice (and not by me) and while those conversations only last a minute or so each and were not mean spirited or negative, everyone agreed that my wife had issues.  I caught myself actually defending her and saying she is 'trying' to turn over a new leaf...but it was surprising to hear the consensus "well, she's got a long way to go and be skeptical...she wants out of her parents house adn 1/2 your money."

I honestly was both bothered and humbled at the same time by these comments.  Had I really been that naive?  Did they see something that I chose to block out for years?  Or are they just being friends and feel obligated to say the 'correct' thing (i.e. It's her fault not yours).  I don't know.  Either way, the BBQ was a blast, and I wish I could do it more often if it wasn't so expensive.

Yesterday (Sunday) was the complete opposite.  Instead of being surrounded by 15+ friends, it was just me and my dog all day long.  I managed to hot the gym, but otherwise I stayed in all day long cleaning, chores, and catching up on TV.  It was nice....bt sucked at the same time.  Didn't really want to go anywhere.  Gas is close to $4.70 a gal now, so I'm trying to make my $$ stretch by not going anywhere.

I watched Joel Osteen yesertday.  His 30 minute sermon was written just for me.  It was a good thing I was alone, otehrwise it would have been embarrassing to see my eyes water up at the message.  The message was about timing....the Lord's timing....not mine.  Oy...it was a humbling reminder that God is at work in all of ur lives whether we recognize it or not, understand it or not.

Today is Columbus Day and I'm at work.  It's slow today.  I think many parents are home with their kids since today is another day off from school.  For the first time in a while it's overcast and cool.  About 20 degrees cooler than it was a week or two back, and I could have slept in longer.  Why can't I sleep in on the weekends, but when I have to be at work (usually Mondays), my body could easily slumber that much longer.