After some mind numbing and confusing back and forth with my lawyer the past few days, he finally provided me with a copy of a letter he sent to my wifes attorney today requesting that this is our second, and final, request that she fill out her PPD's and have them turned in by October 5th.
I know my wife has the day off today, so she will most likely get a message from her attorney today. Why it took these extra two weeks, I have no clue, but needless to say these past 4 days (I only discussed one event with my BIL) I have dealt with my attorney, my BIL, my parents, and a surprise visit from my wife on Sunday (that did not end well).
No wonder I'm only averaging 4-5 hours of sleep per night (if I'm lucky). Even this morning I woke at 3:15am and was up for at least a good hour before I fell back asleep and my dog woke me up finally at 6.
I am so mentally tired from all this. I do not wish this on anyone. I am trying my hardest to remain calm, cordial, and focused....but my wife is making it hard. She knows how to say just the right things to make me second guess all this, and at other times knows just what buttons to push to make me crack.
Between my parents, family, and closest friends....they are constantly re-grounding me and reminding me of the years and years of shennanigans based on her poor decisions, and left me to clean up the mess over and over again.
It's all true......but in my heart....and the commandment from my Lord....I need to stay strong and forgive. I can forgive....forget is a different story.
Has she chanegd?
In many ways yes, but it's only been 7 weeks (or so) from her self-imposed "life coaching" symposium, or whatever it was. Not sure 7 weeks of decent behavior, and 8 days of intense therapy negates years of mental abuse and crappy patterns I've been subject to.
So, I truly expect the proverbial _____ to hit the fan today. Thank goodness I'm at work, but I wholly expect the fireworks to begin later today or tomorrow. And of course, I forgot to take my meds again today (3 days now...I'm screwed).
I wish I could say this was the calm before the storm, but it's been pretty stormy already the last few days.
1 comment:
When you are at work, don't answer your cell, or reply to text messages unless it's from your lawyer. Your job might not be your favorite thing, but right now, your 8+ hours/day can be your safe zone... Your wife isn't there, your friends and family aren't there, so it's a period of time in your day where if you're busy, you can choose not to think on all of the craziness that's been going on.
It sucks, but it is all part of a divorce. They only look easy & simple in the movies... (or at least the ones where people aren't hiring hitmen to take each other out!) Yes, it may get more chaotic and uncomfortable, but you can get through this. You certainly survived years of other types of chaos and discomfort... and YOUR family & friends have YOUR back. Whatever your BIL thought he wanted to convey, he certainly approached his contact with you in a less than professional/or even friendly way - in your best Italian maffia voice, say "Forgedda 'bout it!" Take a deep breath... you've got this.
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