Re-connecting

I recently joined Facebook, a social networking site supposedly geared more to adults than MySpace is. I've seen MySpace before, and I don't particularly care for it. It's just a jumble of random color schemes, music blurbs, and juvenile teen-speak.

MySpace debuted prior to Facebook, and it became the mouthpiece for the whole 15-20 year old crowd, of course there are adults on there as well....and I would imagine many are on there posing as someone they are actually not. A very scary place in cyberspace with adult predators, damaged children, very little monitoring, etc. I actually detest it. I could go on and on about the negatives of MySpce, but that's not what this post is about.

Facebook is the more mature brother to MySpace....where more adults gravitate too, and the conversations and blurbs have a bit more substance without as much vulgarity.

However, I have mixed thoughts on Facebook as well. My wife is addicted to it.....dangerously so. Not that I worry about her 'cheating' on me, but she, like so many others begin to develop an unhealthy addiction to it that it begins to replace actual face-to-face conversations. Just like texting with cellphones....I don't get the point. If you're holding a phone in yoru hand, why not just call? Why would you use a phone to type a message and wait for a reply? Why not 'talk' to the person. I recently heard an interview with various therapists who also warn about teh dangers of this trend....more and more people are not actually talking to each other anymore. Conversations are being chipped down to basic words that fly back and forth in the ether and we as humans are losing are ability to look people in the eye...to read facial expressions, to share 'real' experiences and so on. Everything is becoming snippets, and things of course get lost in translation.

One of my best friends says the same thing. His wife, since introduced to Facebook, is on it all the time, which robs him and her of their relationship together. He hates these social sites and refuses to join.

For a long time I agreed with him, and felt the same way.

Until I looked over my wifes shoulder and discovered I could search for many a lost friend. Before I knew it, I had my own profile created and within minutes had found friends I hadn't seen in over 20-25 years. Elementary schools chums, high school buddies, ex-girlfriends, college fraternity brothers.

Today I have about 60 friends on my 'friends' list....and you know what? My wife isn't listed as one of them. I haven't asked her, and she hasn't asked me. In a way...it may not be a bad idea, but it does still strike me strange that we haven't asked each other to be on our respective social lists. Maybe we need to protect our privacy even in cyberspace. In all honesty, I'm kinda glad she doesn't 'check up' on me...I have had a few ex-girlfriends write me, and while they have been completly innocent, the potential of bringing up the past has been a concern of mine...something I tip-toe around quite a bit. As a matter of fact, this past weekend I had an ex-girlfriend write me which took me by surprise (I'm ashamed to say I forgot about her), and then added in a comment that in regards to my picture "You look great, but then again...you were always easy on the eyes." Of course it was a nice compliment and I'm flattered, but it's nothing I want to share or explain to my wife who this person is, was, or anything else for that matter. Sometimes it's good to have certain chapters in life to be closed....for good.

The one true blessing so far is a college roommate of mine who I haven't seen or spoke to since '93 contacted me. That's 15 years since we last spoke to each other, and I had the opportunity to share with him my testimony of re-discovering God and Christ a few years ago due to some comment I posted. We were able to speak on the phone yesterday for the first time in 15 years. We spoke for about 30 minutes....until he was cut short due to a family manner. We rehashed the past for a bit, and he paid me quite a few compliments as how he remembered me and how he thought I was the one guy 'who had it all together and make something of his life'.

Now that I am in the Lord, I don't have much to hide, and I told him about my issues the last few years.....the depression, the anxiety, the drugs, the emotions, the thoughts of death. He was both shocked and happy....happy that I am now a Christian, for he too became one a few years back as well. He told me about his lows and issues as well and how he came to know the Lord. A far cry since our college days living as modern day Romans.

We were able to share our testimonies with each other, and our frienship seemed like it was as alive today as it was all those years ago, but now we have something else in common....Christ as our savior...and I suppose I need to thank Facebook for bringing us back together.