Well, if it's not one thing, it's the other. Lately, I've been so tired I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open past 9:30pm. If given the chance, I could probably sleep in my car at lunch for the past few weeks. Now today, my eyes sprung open at around 2:11, again in the 3 o'clock hour, again at roughly 4:30, and finally wide awake at around 5:15am.
And I still managed to forget to take my happy pill yet again. I've been so inconsistent as of late, it's probably doing no good for me at all, and I'll have to start a new cycle tomorrow and wait the roughly 2 weeks to get back on track. Ugh.
I was mad yesterday. After writing my entry and sitting in my car driving home, I got mad. I could feel my jaw hinge getting sore from the unconscious clenching I had been doing previously up to that point. I don't know why, but something told me to look at the bank account.
I looked.
I was not happy at what I saw.
My wife, despite not having any more credit cards and no ATM/Debit card anylonger has been writing checks and not giving me a heads-up. Long story short....our mortgage is due the 16th without incurring a an additional $108 late fee, and she doesn't get paid until the 17th. If we spend no money and I mean NO MONEY the next 5 days (means no gas for our cars, no eating out, no nothing), we will still be short roughly $100. The last couple of checks: $40 'bowling' (hers), $89 'beauty supplies' (various shampoos and what not), $35 Ralph's (supplies for a party we got invited too that she volunteered to make tamales). Those were just some of them. And she gets on my case for not keeping a check register??? I check the online statements almost every other day so I know what's up. She actually does keep a check register and is still clueless.
No, I can't even fight with her now. It's just not worth it for me to get worked up, scream and yell for to someone that is in denial. In the end, I'll end up looking like an ass, and somehow it'll be my fault.
We've been doing this 'joint' account thing for almost two months now, and I'm starting to suspect it's not working. Well, it's not working for me, but apparantly working for her because she can keep writing checks counting on me. We spoke briefly about it this morning. She looked at me like "well, there's nothing we can do, so don't stress about it"...Really? There's nothing 'we' can do? Um...yes, 'you' can stop writing checks for $90 worth of shampoo and conditioner. Say maybe skip 'bowling' one week and have an extra $40. Why is up to me to figure everything out?
Dammit...this isn't how I wanted to start my day or weekend. I'm frustrated, a little ticked, forgot my meds, and now broke until next week where we'll be late paying the mortgage. Oh, I just can't wait to go to my inlaws this Thursday and pretent everything is hunky-dory.
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