A little of this and that.

Finally after a two week self-imposed hiatus, I went to church yesterday and it was just what I needed.

The previous two weeks have been a bit stressful and emotionally taxing for me. I lost a friend, my wife informed me that she can't buy presents until after Christmas because she's broke...again... (which made me a bit frustrated, disapointed, and angry) . We're hosting Christmas Eve at my house this year and I'm doing all the cooking, it's been raining a lot (today again) and it's so hard to keep everything clean, and lastly my company is scheduled to layoff yet more people on January 8th (in which there is a chance I may be going).

Very stressful and taxing. I caught myself crying in solitude again on Friday. I just get sooo tired of everything and everyone some times.

I cleaned the house so much yesterday and all I asked my wife to do was to mop the kitchen and dining room in which she said she would, twice, and still never did it. She got testy with me when I didn't clean up a pot I had been using which kinda floored me, seeing that I spent half the day cleaning the house, laundry, grocery shopping, wrapping presesnts, etc., but I bit my tongue and cleaned it anway. And she still never mopped. Eh, but I'll stop the complaining here.

As I was originally saying, I went to church with an open heart and mind because I had an inner desire for my souls thirst to be quenched. My pastor spoke about the history of Christmas from a biblical perspective and my eyes were opened it seemed for the first time. All my previous conceptions of Christmas were shattered as after my 30+ years on this planet did I learn that the wise men numbered more than 3. That they most likely visited Jesus the first time when he was actually 2 years old (not a baby in a manger as all Hallmark cards and nativity scenes indicate). That Myrrh was an embalming spice. That Herod despite being named 'King of the Jews' was not a direct descendant of David. Anyway, it was very historically based and now makes me see things in a whole new light. I was pretty excited, and for the first time in many years I didn't mind singing.

I have two more days of work this week, this being one of them, and then I'm off until January 5th. We'll see if I'm laid off on the 8th though. Please pray for me that I can make it through the Holiday's with love and understanding and compassion and pateience with my wife and family and continually remember what 'Christmas' is all about and not what the world has turned it into the last few years.