ADHD—or Is It Trauma?

I found this article on MSN today.

I found it pretty darn interesting and tried to apply some of the theories discussed to my own youtful past. However, I cannot make a correlation with a traumatic event as described in the article and my own behaviors.

I remember when that very first academic type shrink sat across from me and told me I had adult ADD after spending a mere 10 minutes with me. While that first meeting has already been about 4 years ago, his verbal diagnosis to me feels like it was just the other day.

"You know, since you've been in my office....you haven't stopped talking...and looking around restlessly."

Well yeah....I'm embarrassed to be here, not exactly why I am here other than my wife demanding it, I don't really know much about your profession or my surroundings, and I'm sick and tired of crying for no real reason or having panic attacks anywhere, anytime. Remember, you just asked me a question on how I was feeling......Well, I'm answering you....albeit in detail.

That's just me. I am a very detailed person. One of my pet peeves in life is vagueness, especially in the work place. I work in a technical field. Exactness is a requirement. Guesswork, shortcuts, and lack of information or decision making results in an incomplete or non-functioning environment. If you want me to fix it, or install it, I need to know the 'details' of how you want it done (where, when, how, etc.).

Anyway, I read this article and look back at my childhood. I did not suffer from physcial abuse. I was never around violence or drugs. My dad enjoyed his beer, but wasn't a classic 'drunk'. Maybe my mom was a bit over protective. Scratch that. She was indeed over-protective to a fault, and sadly perhaps I do occassionaly hold that against here.

There were times I was indeed very lonely as a kid. That's why I read so much and was so creative. But my parents, moreso my mom, really did try and provide eveything for me, including love.

I'll be honest. I'm not sure where and when thinsg starting going south at first. I suppose standing at God's vantage point and looking down there may have been a point on the continuum which is my life when I first began to change. Was it a chemical change? A hormonal change? something I saw? Dreamt? Did I just begin to perceive things differently? I have no idea.